love chronicles, love oh love
I remembered it was a hot Saturday afternoon. I was staring blankly at the television, I don’t remember what was on. The free cable had crappy shows and I was constantly flicking the channels to find something good to watch. He was on the other side of the room, busy with his computer games. We both have our own stuff going on except for the Winamp player in his laptop playing random songs which we were both listening to.
There’s one song that got stuck in my head at that particular moment. It was playing and I shifted my blank gaze from the television to him.
I was looking at him and recalling my first two years in college, how I was crying for a reason I don’t know at that time. My mind was just a blur of thoughts. I am not sure if I was crying because of my dad’s recent passing away, or if it was because I was alone, or it was because I felt that no one in the world can understand me and what I was feeling.
I was looking at him and wondering why this person was with me, let alone, existed. There were so many circumstances why we were in the same university, why we met and why we were drawn to each other that it seemed almost impossible that we were in a relationship together.
Maybe that was the reason I felt overwhelmed. There could have been a different guy at that particular time, but it was me and him there in the same room, listening to Oasis’ Champagne Supernova among other songs in the random playlist that I always loved. I was so in love with him, I thought, and I would do anything to keep it that way. I didn’t care what might happen in the future, it was still several years away from where we were then. I just wanted to stay in that moment of trance.
And the song reminded me of that eleven year-old epic high.
I don’t have any regrets in any of my past relationships. But I realized that an epic love only comes once in a person’s lifetime. You will still feel love after succeeding heartbreaks, yes. But I feel that there would only be one time that you will be allowed to love “that” way. Once the shot for epic love has passed, you need to spend the rest of your life just remembering and hoping that you can encounter that same love, or even a far greater one, on your next lifetime.
I believe in one epic love. Unless, otherwise.