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I want to grow out of this shell. I want to live this life like I never did. I want to try out things I haven’t even thought of trying.

I’m out of time.

My eyes on you.

I know what I said
Was heat of the moment
But theres a little truth in between the words we’ve spoken
Its a little late now to fix the heart thats broken
Please don’t ask me where I’m going
Cause I don’t know
No I don’t know anymore

It used to feel like heaven
Used to feel like may
I used to hear those violins playing heart strings like a symphony
Now they’ve gone away
Nobody wants to face the truth
But you wont believe what love can do
Till it happens to you
Till it happens to you

Went to the old flat
Guess I was trying to turn the clock back
How come that nothing feels the same now when I’m with you
We used to stay up all night in the kitchen
When our love was new
Oooh love I’m a fool to believe in you
Cause I don’t know
No I don’t know
Anymore

It used to feel like heaven
It used to feel like may
I used to hear those violins playing heart strings like a symphony
Now they’ve gone away
Nobody wants to know the truth
Until their hearts broken
Don’t you dare tell them
What you think to do
Till they get over
You can only learn these things
From experience
When you get older
I just wish that someone would have told me
Till it happens to you
Till it happens to you
Till it happens to you

The events over the past weeks were overwhelming. I learned that I had to let go. I learned to be independent and take risks. I made tough choices and stayed strong.

Life should not be lived by always being on the safe side. There are always risks worth taking and in the end, there would be no regrets. And eventually you’ll realize that you’re very happy with the new path you chose.

One thing I learned from all this: fight for your happiness and protect it.

Ikaw ang puso ko dahil sayo
Dumadaloy ang dugo
Ikaw ang puso ko dahil sayo
Dumadaloy ang dugo

Ikaw ang puso ko dahil sayo
Dumadanak ng dugo
Ikaw ang puso ko dahil sayo
Dumadanak ng dugo

Sa madaling salita (tuwing ika’y nawawala)
Sa madaling salita (ako’y nawawala)

At sa saliw ng isa’t-isa
Tayong dalawa’y dakila
At sa saliw ng isa’t-isa
Tayong dalawa’y alila

How come I don’t blog anymore?

La la la la la…
La la…

Naranasan mo na ba
Mawalan ng makakasama?
Sa gitna ng daan
Hindi malaman ang pupuntahan

Huwag mag-alala
Hindi kita pababayaan
Sa iyong tabi
Ako ay iyong mahahawakan

Naranasan mo na ba
Madapa at masugatan?
Hawakan mo ako
Hinding-hindi iiwan

I don’t know why but I think it’s happening again. It took months to learn from all the mistakes, accept all the consequences and start anew. Who would’ve thought it caught me off guard? Again.

Complicated decisions lead to chaos. Though they know how complication complicated is, they still go through with it.

I feel like I’m asleep and awake at the same time. I feel impossible. I feel helpless. I feel lost. I feel like giving in but I wouldn’t. Not now.

I’m floating again.

A new, clean theme. Thanks to Wordpress Themes Base.

I’ve been busy for the past few weeks. It’s really hard catching up with tons of stuff at work. Lots to learn, so much to do. But I’m still hanging on. Hopefully this very awkward and stressful part of the adjustment phase would end soon. I still have two months to go before my evaluation so wish me luck.

The whole Kris Allen over Danny Gokey thing being the new American Idol also contributes to the heavy feeling I’m having.

On other news, I’ve started drinking again since my very traumatic experience a few months ago. I’m very surprised to find out that my face starts to get hot after just one bottle of beer. I had tasted the ice cold San Mig Light below zero last week with my room mates. That was the best beer I had since I don’t know when. I know there are several restaurants serving these beers around Metro Manila but I had mine in Grilla in Kalayaan.

I am guessing this week at work would be as hell as the past weeks. I’ll try watching Star Trek and Angels & Demons, that is, if they’re still showing so I can have something to look forward to.

Things are really not as bad as they seem. How’s that for positivity.

Danny Gokey’s out of American Idol Season 8. He’s the one I’ve been watching all season and now that he’s out, I sorta don’t care who would win between Adam Lambert and Kris Allen.

I had my bets at the very start of the season. I was blown away (parang judge a) by Leneshe Young and her song composition. Her audition stood out among all others for me. I was sad when she didn’t make it through the Hollywood week. There was also Emily Wynne Hughes, the girl who sang Barracuda. She was one of the many victims of group day. In the top 36 weeks, I was hoping Jesse Langseth would make it to top 12. I was wondering why the judges preferred Tatiana over her.

In the top 13, my bets were Lil Rounds and Danny Gokey. Their stories were very interesting and my imagination says they would become even more interesting when they win the competition. After watching Lil Rounds pick the wrong songs (as per the judges), Danny Gokey’s my bet for American Idol that can beat Adam Lambert. He has different ways of making the songs colorful using different tones whereas the original song only has a few. One of the songs he sang was What Hurts The Most. I haven’t heard the original, but loved his version anyway. It reminds me of his wife’s story.

So now he’s out of the competition, I don’t know who I should pick between Adam and Kris. But I guess whoever wins this, they all would have an exciting career ahead of them, including Matt and Lil and some of the top 13 contestants.